Percussionist Foster Grant
Pulsating Member
32" inseam??
"My name is Geoff Tate." - Geoff Tate
Posts: 37,123 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 62,136
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Post by Percussionist Foster Grant on Apr 17, 2019 17:11:41 GMT -5
The dream of the nineties is alive in Portland.* *if the dream is being a piece of shit who takes advantage of people The entire time Iβve been reading this thread Iβve been picturing portlandia characters
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guttertech
Turgid Member
Posts: 775 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 1,313
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Post by guttertech on Apr 17, 2019 17:13:11 GMT -5
also how confident are all three parties that it wasnt OO sucking Inches' dick? with the kind of drinking going on over there I don't think I can truly trust any of them. they are all unreliable narrators for this story. perhaps the final chapter was there was no girlfriend shaping up to be a definitive case study in dissociative identity disorder
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0 Join Date: Jan 1, 1970
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2019 17:13:36 GMT -5
I felt bad and Venmo'd him the money for his plane ticket thinking he was going to have to cancel his flight and get screwed. You should hit him in his shit for bring you up itt without mentioning this detail imo
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cowboydan
Turgid Member
JJ
Posts: 863 Join Date: Jul 19, 2018 Likes: 1,045
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Post by cowboydan on Apr 17, 2019 17:19:42 GMT -5
Havenβt checked this thread in like 4 hours and thereβs only been an additional page. What the fuck? You probably wouldn't be hoping for more pages of speculation, analysis, and jokes if it were people talking about your personal life problems
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Post by hatredgrowsininches on Apr 17, 2019 17:19:54 GMT -5
Came home from breakfast this morning and Phil(Oldorder) was at the apartment packing up and waiting to apologize to me. We spent a while talking, I spent sometime helping him out and everything is fine and worked out between he and I. There's nothing to this anymore. He told me he isn't fucking with the board anymore and wont be posting although I guess only time will tell that one but I do believe him. I'm not answering a single question about this anymore and neither is he. Shut it down, lock it down and move on with your lives.
Phil: "Tell them I need a "The B9 ruined my life" sticker. Me: "Seriously, you sure?" Phil: "Oh, yes"
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not Worship
Pulsating Member
this is the very last thing i have ever read, gootbye
Posts: 39,121 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 95,575
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Post by not Worship on Apr 17, 2019 17:20:20 GMT -5
Havenβt checked this thread in like 4 hours and thereβs only been an additional page. What the fuck? You probably wouldn't be hoping for more pages of speculation, analysis, and jokes if it were people talking about your personal life problems We live by the sword and die by the sword
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not Worship
Pulsating Member
this is the very last thing i have ever read, gootbye
Posts: 39,121 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 95,575
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Post by not Worship on Apr 17, 2019 17:20:55 GMT -5
Apologized to you????!?!
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roofies
Pulsating Member
raped in space by jeff bezos
gender relations life coach
Posts: 8,065 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 11,084
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Post by roofies on Apr 17, 2019 17:21:51 GMT -5
Story over.
But we need to know what up with the girl....
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Post by escapedfromthevalley on Apr 17, 2019 17:22:41 GMT -5
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chaospouch
Pulsating Member
30 minutes delicate
Posts: 16,103 Join Date: Jul 7, 2018
Likes: 50,974
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Post by chaospouch on Apr 17, 2019 17:23:46 GMT -5
More to cum
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chaospouch
Pulsating Member
30 minutes delicate
Posts: 16,103 Join Date: Jul 7, 2018
Likes: 50,974
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Post by chaospouch on Apr 17, 2019 17:25:14 GMT -5
Thatβs hella tight you were able to move across the country and just slide into an apartment and a relationship in such a short time frame, gotta hand it to you playa
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gold soundz
Turgid Member
Posts: 1,352 Join Date: Jun 29, 2018
Likes: 3,928
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Post by gold soundz on Apr 17, 2019 17:25:29 GMT -5
Extremely anticlimactic ending. I almost feel like this was all a ruse to get BiL all fired up.
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lilmeatsauce
Engorged Member
klingon
Posts: 2,616 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 4,073
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Post by lilmeatsauce on Apr 17, 2019 17:29:15 GMT -5
i want oldolder and hatredgrowsininches to develop a really strong friendship now.
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chaospouch
Pulsating Member
30 minutes delicate
Posts: 16,103 Join Date: Jul 7, 2018
Likes: 50,974
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Post by chaospouch on Apr 17, 2019 17:30:34 GMT -5
They could swap trade secrets if you catch my drift
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not Worship
Pulsating Member
this is the very last thing i have ever read, gootbye
Posts: 39,121 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 95,575
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Post by not Worship on Apr 17, 2019 17:31:49 GMT -5
Im assuming this chick will be living w neither of you
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0 Join Date: Jan 1, 1970
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2019 17:34:51 GMT -5
lol wtf do liberals have to do with anything? Just connecting the dots here. don't you have a child sex ring under a pizza shop to break up or something?
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stephanie
Pulsating Member
goth icon
Posts: 21,228 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 32,408
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Post by stephanie on Apr 17, 2019 17:36:04 GMT -5
lol @ this being a sticky now
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roofies
Pulsating Member
raped in space by jeff bezos
gender relations life coach
Posts: 8,065 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 11,084
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Post by roofies on Apr 17, 2019 17:36:31 GMT -5
Just connecting the dots here. don't you have a child sex ring under a pizza shop to break up or something? sure. let me get on that.
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chaospouch
Pulsating Member
30 minutes delicate
Posts: 16,103 Join Date: Jul 7, 2018
Likes: 50,974
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Post by chaospouch on Apr 17, 2019 17:38:32 GMT -5
This magic the gathering connection has me concerned for hotdogs and anti todoβs relationship, rip
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0 Join Date: Jan 1, 1970
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2019 17:39:51 GMT -5
don't you have a child sex ring under a pizza shop to break up or something? sure. let me get on that. don't forget your rifle my guy
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cfloyd3
Engorged Member
Sky Lopez gang
Posts: 2,682 Join Date: Jun 28, 2018
Likes: 4,702
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Post by cfloyd3 on Apr 17, 2019 17:42:34 GMT -5
Im assuming this chick will be living w neither of you I need a room in PDX
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Post by lurkinhardorhardlylu on Apr 17, 2019 17:43:27 GMT -5
Came home from breakfast this morning and Phil(Oldorder) was at the apartment packing up and waiting to apologize to me. We spent a while talking, I spent sometime helping him out and everything is fine and worked out between he and I. There's nothing to this anymore. He told me he isn't fucking with the board anymore and wont be posting although I guess only time will tell that one but I do believe him. I'm not answering a single question about this anymore and neither is he. Shut it down, lock it down and move on with your lives. Phil: "Tell them I need a "The B9 ruined my life" sticker. Me: "Seriously, you sure?" Phil: "Oh, yes" roofies was right. we are living in a simulation
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0 Join Date: Jan 1, 1970
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2019 17:54:33 GMT -5
I feel like people think Iβm some how oblivious to how fucked up this is This dude offered me help when I really needed it, stuck his hand out and I ended up shitting in his palm. Itβs completely fucked. I got fucked over by crawlingcosmichorror, pretty sure thatβs his poster name but I apologize if Iβm wrong and Oldorder came through and helped me out in the last second, practically literally. This was not something I ever intended, itβs completely wrong, completely fucked and itβs just one more thing to hate myself for at this point I didnβt come into this dudes apartment like, βWhereβs your girlfriend? Iβm tryna fuck.β. She started flirting with me literally in front of him and since he was too drunk to notice, it just got more and more extreme. I would leave the apartment for practically days. One night, theyβre both drinking and sheβs doing the usual shit. I didnβt want to deal with it so I wen't in my bedroom, turned off the light and just closed my eyes and wen't to lie down. Five minutes later, the door opens and shuts but the lights stay off, all of a sudden I hear her whispering my name loudly. I couldnβt believe what the fuck was going on. She walked out after about 40 seconds and when I walked out, Oldorder was sitting less than 15 feet away from me, drinking and playing magic online. If he ever paid attention to anything other then magic or drinking, he might have realized what was going on before it happened like it did. This is why I mentioned his drinking so much in the posts where I mentioned it. His drinking and hers played a huge role in this. Obviously so did I, Iβm not saying I didnβt. This is a lot more complicated than people are realizing. Its why I was so pissed last night when I responded to his posts, especially after spending almost a week together in the apartment after I told him. u didn't shit in his palm bro u fucked his girl tbh i think he'd prefer a turd in his hand
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Post by ππΌπππ½πββπππβ on Apr 17, 2019 18:08:53 GMT -5
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Post by career sewerslide on Apr 17, 2019 18:15:01 GMT -5
Jinxed it
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stephanie
Pulsating Member
goth icon
Posts: 21,228 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 32,408
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Post by stephanie on Apr 17, 2019 18:21:32 GMT -5
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bonerinsweatpants
Pulsating Member
*Break Stuff riff*
Credit Card Churner superfan
Posts: 12,588 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
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BiL Premium Poster: π»
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Post by bonerinsweatpants on Apr 17, 2019 18:23:20 GMT -5
this has to be one of the biggest/funniest backfires by someone on b9 in quite some time lol
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0 Join Date: Jan 1, 1970
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Post by Deleted on Apr 17, 2019 18:23:20 GMT -5
OOOF
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captainsunshine
Pulsating Member
#1 Frasier Fan
Posts: 12,410 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 14,158
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Post by captainsunshine on Apr 17, 2019 18:43:24 GMT -5
Oldorder was waiting to apologize to me lol wut
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lil stormy
Throbbing Member
Posts: 4,815 Join Date: Jul 14, 2018
Likes: 5,330
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Post by lil stormy on Apr 17, 2019 18:43:31 GMT -5
And they all lived happily ever after. The end.
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