Hotdogscominurway
Throbbing Member
rocker; reformed deleter; bald
Counting pussy freckles
Posts: 3,925 Join Date: Feb 29, 2020
Likes: 9,126
BiL Premium Poster: 👨💻
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Post by Hotdogscominurway on May 5, 2021 10:49:12 GMT -5
last two dudes i banged totaled out to 6min of sex. fml 6 mins?! How do they last so long? You idiot, that was a combined time
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pisswizard
Pulsating Member
Count Dublin
Think or thwim.
Posts: 13,468 Join Date: May 2, 2019
Likes: 28,181
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Post by pisswizard on May 5, 2021 10:49:16 GMT -5
If i blew in 6 minutes I’d feel like i ripped myself off as well.
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Cholo Molester
Pulsating Member
our very own Gideon Yago 🌚
off the duster
Posts: 19,931 Join Date: Jul 5, 2018
Likes: 34,959
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Post by Cholo Molester on May 5, 2021 10:51:10 GMT -5
Dudes be like “imma murder that pussy” but then nut after 3 pumps 💀
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not Worship
Pulsating Member
this is the very last thing i have ever read, gootbye
Posts: 39,121 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 95,502
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Post by not Worship on May 5, 2021 11:00:35 GMT -5
So horny for my physical tomorrow with my middle aged big bubble butt milf doctor. So many fantasies ugh. tbh i have gotten this from multiple people about like labcoat cosplay and shit haha
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meatballmaniac
Pulsating Member
Posts: 8,575 Join Date: Jul 12, 2019
Likes: 27,717
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Post by meatballmaniac on May 5, 2021 11:03:46 GMT -5
Havent jerked off in like 6 days, my g's don't you have a gf? so you can be banging it out instead! That’s not how it works.
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pisswizard
Pulsating Member
Count Dublin
Think or thwim.
Posts: 13,468 Join Date: May 2, 2019
Likes: 28,181
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Post by pisswizard on May 5, 2021 11:04:52 GMT -5
The best i got was a middle age woman had to swab my bango string when i ripped it.
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meatballmaniac
Pulsating Member
Posts: 8,575 Join Date: Jul 12, 2019
Likes: 27,717
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Post by meatballmaniac on May 5, 2021 11:06:38 GMT -5
The best i got was a middle age woman had to swab my bango string when i ripped it. I don’t speak Australian, but this sounds awesome.
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pisswizard
Pulsating Member
Count Dublin
Think or thwim.
Posts: 13,468 Join Date: May 2, 2019
Likes: 28,181
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Post by pisswizard on May 5, 2021 11:07:34 GMT -5
The best i got was a middle age woman had to swab my bango string when i ripped it. I don’t speak Australian, but this sounds awesome. Penis injury is never awesome.
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sarahohio
Throbbing Member
Board's Bottom Bitch
Posts: 4,129 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 9,989
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Post by sarahohio on May 5, 2021 11:08:03 GMT -5
Dudes be like “imma murder that pussy” but then nut after 3 pumps 💀 literally what they both basically told me.
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meatballmaniac
Pulsating Member
Posts: 8,575 Join Date: Jul 12, 2019
Likes: 27,717
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Post by meatballmaniac on May 5, 2021 11:09:20 GMT -5
Dudes be like “imma murder that pussy” but then nut after 3 pumps 💀 literally what they both basically told me. Stop being excessively hot. This sounds like your problem.
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pisswizard
Pulsating Member
Count Dublin
Think or thwim.
Posts: 13,468 Join Date: May 2, 2019
Likes: 28,181
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Post by pisswizard on May 5, 2021 11:11:26 GMT -5
Round two is mandatory if it’s such a low time.
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sarahohio
Throbbing Member
Board's Bottom Bitch
Posts: 4,129 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 9,989
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Post by sarahohio on May 5, 2021 11:11:29 GMT -5
literally what they both basically told me. Stop being excessively hot. This sounds like your problem. hahahaaha i wish. i mean...my pussy be goooood, but not that fucking good. like, did these dudes quarantine their dicks the past year and just had a mega bust with me? Because they both seemed like they fuck. False advertising ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/6839503/images/AnLfEIXhUQXjJkCIxRFy.gif)
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Post by sourtimes after dark 🎃 on May 5, 2021 11:12:28 GMT -5
Havent jerked off in like 6 days, my g's don't you have a gf? so you can be banging it out instead! He is the master of his domain.
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lilpat
Throbbing Member
resident NSBM and Kpop superfan
Posts: 3,334 Join Date: Jan 18, 2021
Likes: 9,558
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Post by lilpat on May 5, 2021 11:27:13 GMT -5
i try and be honest from the get-go. my dick is a fickle being, to the point where i should probably have a serious conversation with a PCP.
sometimes i’m a two pump chump, sometimes i go for an hour and never shoot my juice, sometimes it doesn’t cooperate at all and i feel like i’m mangling it just to get some semblance of ~up~. i got fickle dick
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Ass Dan
Pulsating Member
lacks jaynaysaykwa
Posts: 11,909 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 15,048
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Post by Ass Dan on May 5, 2021 11:28:25 GMT -5
last two dudes i banged totaled out to 6min of sex. fml Gotta find dudes on SSRI’s.
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sarahohio
Throbbing Member
Board's Bottom Bitch
Posts: 4,129 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 9,989
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Post by sarahohio on May 5, 2021 11:28:46 GMT -5
i totally understand sometimes it happens. Two dudes in a row though? First dude i think was so embarrassed we won't be hooking up again. Second dude i'll give him another go.
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ITID
Pulsating Member
least likely to win at literally anything
Actually funny, not actually fun
Posts: 21,625 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 43,465
BiL Premium Poster: 👨💻
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Post by ITID on May 5, 2021 11:30:11 GMT -5
Dudes be like “imma murder that pussy” but then nut after 3 pumps 💀 Guys be out there thinkin they're apex predators until they find out the pussy fight back. Shame.
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not Worship
Pulsating Member
this is the very last thing i have ever read, gootbye
Posts: 39,121 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 95,502
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Post by not Worship on May 5, 2021 11:34:17 GMT -5
Fuckulator3000 pussy
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Cholo Molester
Pulsating Member
our very own Gideon Yago 🌚
off the duster
Posts: 19,931 Join Date: Jul 5, 2018
Likes: 34,959
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Post by Cholo Molester on May 5, 2021 11:36:45 GMT -5
Sometimes when I’m having sex I’ll try to fuck to the beat or the guitar riff. I was listening to Billie Jean last week during a practice bang and I kept moving my hips to the main riff and she totally called me out on it. 💀💀💀💀
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Pat
Pulsating Member
bodybuilder monica lewisnky
various whatnots
Posts: 13,528 Join Date: Oct 28, 2018
Likes: 22,274
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Post by Pat on May 5, 2021 11:36:55 GMT -5
the lucy too juicy
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theaccountant
Limp Member
Posts: 41 Join Date: Feb 27, 2021
Likes: 66
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Post by theaccountant on May 5, 2021 12:14:08 GMT -5
i try and be honest from the get-go. my dick is a fickle being, to the point where i should probably have a serious conversation with a PCP. sometimes i’m a two pump chump, sometimes i go for an hour and never shoot my juice, sometimes it doesn’t cooperate at all and i feel like i’m mangling it just to get some semblance of ~up~. i got fickle dick Tell me about it brother. Met up with a beautiful African American working girl last week with the most perfect mocha skin, a big DD rack, and the most mathematically perfect big ass possible. Fucking unbelievable golden ratio shit or something. But after an hour of teasing, sucking, and fucking, I still couldn't blow. Holy fuck the blue balls were so bad I felt like my heart was gonna explode driving home.
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Hotdogscominurway
Throbbing Member
rocker; reformed deleter; bald
Counting pussy freckles
Posts: 3,925 Join Date: Feb 29, 2020
Likes: 9,126
BiL Premium Poster: 👨💻
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Post by Hotdogscominurway on May 5, 2021 12:24:22 GMT -5
Stop being excessively hot. This sounds like your problem. hahahaaha i wish. i mean...my pussy be goooood, but not that fucking good. like, did these dudes quarantine their dicks the past year and just had a mega bust with me? Because they both seemed like they fuck. False advertising ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/6839503/images/AnLfEIXhUQXjJkCIxRFy.gif) sup
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sarahohio
Throbbing Member
Board's Bottom Bitch
Posts: 4,129 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018 Likes: 9,989
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Post by sarahohio on May 5, 2021 12:51:26 GMT -5
hahahaaha i wish. i mean...my pussy be goooood, but not that fucking good. like, did these dudes quarantine their dicks the past year and just had a mega bust with me? Because they both seemed like they fuck. False advertising ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/6839503/images/AnLfEIXhUQXjJkCIxRFy.gif) supjust chillin in Ohio, u?
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twoforflinching
Turgid Member
Posts: 1,768 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 2,286
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Post by twoforflinching on May 5, 2021 12:51:51 GMT -5
The best i got was a middle age woman had to swab my bango string when i ripped it. Not to make light on what I’m sure was a horrible time for you but that’s such a great collection of words
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JDS~~~*
Pulsating Member
ol wrangler wearin ass
Concentrating on riffs
Posts: 9,102 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 15,953
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Post by JDS~~~* on May 5, 2021 13:33:01 GMT -5
So horny for my physical tomorrow with my middle aged big bubble butt milf doctor. So many fantasies ugh. Not the same, but I had sex with a middle aged LMT. That was pretty wild.
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Pat
Pulsating Member
bodybuilder monica lewisnky
various whatnots
Posts: 13,528 Join Date: Oct 28, 2018
Likes: 22,274
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Post by Pat on May 5, 2021 13:48:39 GMT -5
So horny for my physical tomorrow with my middle aged big bubble butt milf doctor. So many fantasies ugh. Not the same, but I had sex with a middle aged LMT. That was pretty wild.
I wonder if your "middle aged" is the same as his?
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JDS~~~*
Pulsating Member
ol wrangler wearin ass
Concentrating on riffs
Posts: 9,102 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 15,953
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Post by JDS~~~* on May 5, 2021 13:51:50 GMT -5
Not the same, but I had sex with a middle aged LMT. That was pretty wild.
I wonder if your "middle aged" is the same as his?
she was maybe 2-3 years older than I, I am Middle Aged.
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ITID
Pulsating Member
least likely to win at literally anything
Actually funny, not actually fun
Posts: 21,625 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 43,465
BiL Premium Poster: 👨💻
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Post by ITID on May 5, 2021 13:59:39 GMT -5
I wonder if your "middle aged" is the same as his?
she was maybe 2-3 years older than I, I am Middle Aged. I wonder if your "middle aged" is the same as mine. I am middle aged.
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JDS~~~*
Pulsating Member
ol wrangler wearin ass
Concentrating on riffs
Posts: 9,102 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 15,953
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Post by JDS~~~* on May 5, 2021 14:01:13 GMT -5
she was maybe 2-3 years older than I, I am Middle Aged. I wonder if your "middle aged" is the same as mine. I am middle aged. I'm 47
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ITID
Pulsating Member
least likely to win at literally anything
Actually funny, not actually fun
Posts: 21,625 Join Date: Jun 27, 2018
Likes: 43,465
BiL Premium Poster: 👨💻
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Post by ITID on May 5, 2021 14:02:27 GMT -5
Not gunna lie, I thought you were 50. My bad.
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